November 28, 2006

• Confidence.

  
  

  Some mornings when she wakes up, she would feel this surge of adrenaline.

  
  

  “It’s a brand new day Secret_agent_nelle”, she would tell herself.

  
  

  She puts on her best clothing, her best accessories and her best make up. She looks into the mirror and let out a smile of approval. Then she tucks her chin up and sticks her nose  up into the air as a finishing touch. “There, an air of confidence no body will be able to miss.”

  
  

  She gathers her work and carefully places into her bag. She takes one last look out the window. She opens the door, and the winter air engulfs her.

  
  

  And there goes Secret_agent_nelle out the door, to conquer the world and her dreams – and of course, she will always carry herself with her nose up in the air.

  
  

  _______________
  
  She’s a Barbie Doll.

  
  

  A is like a lifelike Barbie Doll. Standing 5’11 or so, flawless blonde hair, gleaming blue eyes, and her highly regarded fashion sense makes me look like a piece of pale cardboard when I stand next to her. I’ll be honest, she makes me nervous sometimes. Always wondering what she thinks of me — or what she thinks about my clothes. She is probably the only person that makes me feel that way — let me get this straight — she is always well put together under any weather or light. She can easily pass as a model.

  
  

  Although that is the case, we would still have countless conversations on the bus rides that we accompanying each other so seldomly. Well, tonight was one of those nights that we bumped into each other and talked our lives away. She keeps telling me to call her, and when I don’t, she would flick her newly bought fleece gloves at me. And at that moment, in search of an answer, I felt what all men would’ve felt. “I swear, I swear I did try to call you!”, I explained. 

  
  

  What really intrigues me is that somebody like A would even bother to talk to me. A was never the popular conniving blondes, she was different, but still girly. I don’t know how well I would be as a friend with A, but she keeps trying to keep in contact, so I must be doing something that interests her in return. Let’s just see where this goes.

  
  

  Sometimes, I think it’s smart in life to choose who you want to be friends with first, and not be friends with everybody you come across. Just because it’s better to not establish much at first, then having to realizing the friendship is futile in the middle and having to make decisions to walk seperate paths. It is better to make friends for spiritual and intellectual purposes, rather than the purposes of networking or just chilling. As we grow older, time becomes gold/money/prize possession. Time should not be dealt with lightly, and should only go to those that really deserve it. I can buy all the riches in the world, but time can never be bought. So cheers to my friends whom truly deserve our well-spent time together.

  
  

  ________________

  
  

  P.S – In light of Christmas and shopping for gifts, A says that for a relationship of 3-4 months, the present should be at a maximum of $50 or less.
  
  I threw my head back and laughed, I thought — where did she get a specific number like 50? Xangans, are there some rules about gifts shopping for lovers that exists out there that I don’t know about? What rules do you go by?

  • 9:27 am
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